I Once took so much Ecstacy that I tried to hug a fire.
There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
bring the vodka.
i thought we were going to mcdonalds..?
we are.
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
True love is when you jack off and continue talking to the girl you like
Why do you text me weird shit like this?
I had a dream about that dude. It was the first time I had a dream about him since the tryst.
The tryst?
The hookup. I like using sophisticated words for my foolish decisions. Makes me retain some dignity.
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
Dude we smoked with a bunch of random stoners in a forest, then group hugged. It was the most magical thing we've ever done.
I don't know. I wanna do you but I also want a cheeseburger.
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
Come on in and take your pants off
Randomize