It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
he was so nervous about his first time.. it was like michael j. fox trying to put on a condom...
He just gave himself a boner while driving using "the power of his mind"
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
im still going. this is my new reality. also. dont take glowsticks in the bath. they explode. actually. do. it. its beautiful.
i dont think thats healthy man...
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
Waking up with cheese all over my clothes and my vibrator in my pants is a sign we drank way too much tequila last night
I just did the math technically I'll be drunk until 2:30-3:00pm
I feel like I lost a fight with an 800 lb gorilla made of tequila
Yeah, but i got vodka and bacon out of it, so it's fine.
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
I told him to take his man panties off and take the fucking Jaeger bomb already, so no to a 2nd date
Randomize
