Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(972): View more from Texas

Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?

(469): View more from Texas

Ya, why?

(972): View more from Texas

We should try that some time.

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(972): Remember that sex scene from American Psycho? (469): Ya, why? (972): We should try that some time. http://tfl.nu/72x3

Replies (10) Good night (1162) Bad night (591)
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(206): View more from Washington

So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?

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(206): So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia? http://tfl.nu/7m55

Replies (14) Good night (612) Bad night (3565)
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(401): View more from Rhode Island

he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.

(1-401): View more from Rhode Island

i dont think thats weird i think thats fun

(401): View more from Rhode Island

i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird

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(401): he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places. (1-401): i dont think thats weird i think thats fun (401): i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird http://tfl.nu/88jj

Replies (11) Good night (630) Bad night (2070)
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(914): View more from New York

dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.

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(914): dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk. http://tfl.nu/x11o

Replies (3) Good night (764) Bad night (1996)
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(505): View more from New Mexico

My toast was "here's to being positive, and testing negative... Cheers!"... after that chick gagged on her shot, everyone knew.... slut.

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(505): My toast was "here's to being positive, and testing negative... Cheers!"... after that chick gagged on her shot, everyone knew.... slut. http://tfl.nu/nzlu

Replies (18) Good night (4292) Bad night (686)
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(330): View more from Ohio

if I could go back to kindergarten and not fuck up my life, I so would.

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(330): if I could go back to kindergarten and not fuck up my life, I so would. http://tfl.nu/x08w

Replies (16) Good night (3953) Bad night (1172)
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(803): View more from South Carolina

I woke up covered in my own vomit with a pocket full of napkins. I guess I knew I would need them, but was not coherent enough to use them before passing out.

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(803): I woke up covered in my own vomit with a pocket full of napkins. I guess I knew I would need them, but was not coherent enough to use them before passing out. http://tfl.nu/rwiz

Replies (10) Good night (738) Bad night (3735)
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(701): View more from North Dakota

My STD test came back clean. I'd like to thank all the guys I've slept with, they made this possible. I want to say thanks to all my friends, for believing in me living up to the full slut potential. And last but not least, I'd like to thank alcohol. I wouldn't be who I am today w/out you. I feel like I need to frame this...

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(701): My STD test came back clean. I'd like to thank all the guys I've slept with, they made this possible. I want to say thanks to all my friends, for believing in me living up to the full slut potential. And last but not least, I'd like to thank alcohol. I wouldn't be who I am today w/out you. I feel like I need to frame this... http://tfl.nu/7jfd

Replies (70) Good night (6247) Bad night (1189)
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(917): View more from New York City

I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant

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(917): I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant http://tfl.nu/lnj1

Replies (40) Good night (4918) Bad night (1548)
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(773): View more from Illinois

Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.

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(773): Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices. http://tfl.nu/v05l

Replies (8) Good night (2735) Bad night (930)
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(626): View more from California

I'm having mini little movies in my head. Like for example. You were talking to a blue whale with jazz man sunglasses, but not the ray charles jazz sunglass. More like sunglasses that are round. Anyway, he has a baguette and stupid french hat. And you , you had your harry potter glasses.

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(626): I'm having mini little movies in my head. Like for example. You were talking to a blue whale with jazz man sunglasses, but not the ray charles jazz sunglass. More like sunglasses that are round. Anyway, he has a baguette and stupid french hat. And you , you had your harry potter glasses. http://tfl.nu/ogb0

Replies (3) Good night (1131) Bad night (478)
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(706): View more from Georgia

I'll always remember you bringing me that pregnancy test in the middle of an ice storm. Best friend ever.

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(706): I'll always remember you bringing me that pregnancy test in the middle of an ice storm. Best friend ever. http://tfl.nu/oprl

Replies (4) Good night (1262) Bad night (295)
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(903): View more from Texas

Today is the day I die from a hangover. I love you, mom. Farewell.

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(903): Today is the day I die from a hangover. I love you, mom. Farewell. http://tfl.nu/clzb

Replies (4) Good night (523) Bad night (290)
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(404): View more from Georgia

Next time I feel awkward in a situation I'm going to just yell "free bird!!!!" Like some redneck at lynyrd skynyrd show

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(404): Next time I feel awkward in a situation I'm going to just yell "free bird!!!!" Like some redneck at lynyrd skynyrd show http://tfl.nu/4xxy

Replies (3) Good night (471) Bad night (184)
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(703): View more from Virginia

Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?

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(703): Is it possible to break your brain with drugs? http://tfl.nu/145b

Replies (7) Good night (251) Bad night (394)

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