If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
I like to use the word "seasoned" over "slutty", you know, like a good curly fry
Speaking of school, I've done the math and I get laid about 10 times more often than I did before I got my law degree. $100,000 well spent.
Dude I thought this was going to suck, but moving back in with my dad is like being at a frat party every night only everyone is 40 years old.
You totally drew a penis wizard on my closet that says "I travel for cock rock"
Sometimes you gotta take the crosseyed stripper. fuck it
She started howling at the moon. That was pretty much the deal breaker.
made the entire pub sing the british national anthem, puked, rallied, then peed in a telephone booth and have pictures to prove it, taking tourism to another level since 2012.
I guess she was just worried I'd end up sleeping with you again
It's not too late to disappoint her you know...
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
Dude...are you really going to start sexting during our friend's memorial service?
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
There's not really an emoticon that says "I'm sorry I honked your boobs, and that you weren't a fan of that."
I have aggressive nipples.
Remind me to NEVER AGAIN mix beer with tequila with beer with whiskey with vodka with rum with vodka.
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