halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
you're out of your mind
you look like daphne blake and he looks like fozzie bear
it's like he rubbed a lamp and wished you into existence
neither the pictures you took nor my hangover explain why there are skittles in my shoe
Best idea ever: Giving hobos a beer and having a chugging contest to win another beer. Most fun I have had downtown in a while.
Ohhh, TODAY your worried. Becasue last weekend when we warned you about her you said "shes too hot to have herpes."
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
If you need us, Zoe and I will be on my kitchen floor drinking Gatorade and crying
His flight is delayed. Mother Nature is delaying me from sex.
I'm going to bed early so football can come sooner
So, no matter what happens today, hold on to this. At least you're not naked under your ex husband's trench coat being stopped by the police who also work with your ex husband. Long story. Actually, not a long story. That's it.
I ain't lettin her quit anyway. We don't fuck enough for her to meet the housewife requirements
You came in, yelled 'i am from the future' then puked all over the floor
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
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