I swear to God, I saw my life flash between my legs.
me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
I just found out why they dont make table-dance tables out of glass.
Drunk at a girls little league game. Hello summer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Vodka and Eggs at 9:30AM = thank you, America.
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
I just did the math. It is, in fact, cheaper to go out drinking every weekend than it would be for me to pay for a legitimate therapist. What are you doing next Friday night?
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When she asked why I felt bad I said that it may have had something to do with the gin and cold pizza I had for breakfast.... And then I reflected on what my life has become.
this relationship shit is hard. like i'd like to be able to watch veep without him trying to dry hump me. also im drunk and its 11 am so
I just accidentally deep throated a popsicle in front of my parents
If you don't see me at the bar tomorrow night, I was most likely captured by the communists.
Is talking to an iron man poster a good or bad indicator that you've been drinking too much?
I’m excited to finally meet my stalkee and his penis!
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