It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
Its official. 'Jingle Bell Rock' gives me a boner. Thank you Lindsay Lohan & Rachel McAdams.
You texted me 'I am the leopard prince', with a series of pictures of you posing in what seemed like cat poses. you were not "a little bit" drunk dude..
Free tacos and bad night are never used in the same sentence
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
Why is it every time you ask me what I'm doing, I'm at a police station?
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
I'm a bit broke right now... Would it be OK if I pay you in champagne and Xanax?
I appreciate alcohol much more now that I have to be sober sometimes
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
also, when i showed up he started talking to me and eventually asked me if the girls treated me well. i went on to talk about my sex life. he was talking about his secretaries.
Stopping for a booty call on the way to a lunch date... Bad form?
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