I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
you told his mom that the only thing he wants for christmas is his dick in your mouth
I need to stop fucking people before I get to know them
I think my penis ruined a perfectly good friendship.
Still burping lighter fluid. Totally awful.
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
Officially drug you out of White Castle last night by the hood on your sweatshirt after you cussed out the attendant and stole the satisfaction guaranteed sign because they were closed!
And then we felt it necessary to continue drinking for another 4 hours, yikes
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
I'm on the couch watching HGTV googling giant boob Halloween costumes so life is swell
In my defense, the second lapdance I gave was because of a dare.
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