we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
is it wrong that I want a "Where The Wild Things Are" tshirt that points to my junk?
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
His penis was definitely too big to be the type that wants commitment. Shit.
It's like I opened a door and behind it lay mythical creatures sprinklin fairy dust upon the land leading me to a pot of gold. And that gold is some delicious cock.
My drunk neighbor is arguing with a goose in his yard. This was the highlight of my day.
I only saw you for about 5 min, but you were rambling about how not even the whiskey could make you fight the skeleton guards.
He kept checkin to make sure you were still alive after you passed out on his bed, After like the 4th time he walked back in there you were naked on his bed eating an apple, claiming he needed to be the Adam to your Eve..That drunk..
I have a story for you. It involves waffles and getting naked with the local weatherman.
Do you ever have one of those days when your breasts are just fucking awesome?
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
Thank you for stroking my rage monster tonight.
Somebody broke the sliding door, and someone ripped the toilet seat off the toilet. So yeah, pretty typical friday night
Randomize
