Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
GUESS WHAT I JUST LICKED
I feel like half our conversations start this way.
im dressed up like a present. waiting for someone to unwrap me ;)
this is your brother
His dick was so small it sat perched on top of his balls like it was king of his scrotum.
where'd the toddler underneathe the beer pong table come from?
Found your pants in the mailbox
What were my pants doing in the mailbox?
I don't know but there's postage on them
I am a human short and spout . Here is my jager Herr is my redbull . When i get real drink i shout out. Tip me over and pour yeager out
My dad just decided to play wingman for me... I dont want to let the family down... but both these girls are hideous
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
FUCK BUDDYS DON'T HOLD HANDS. NO EXCEPTIONS.
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
Dude, I woke up with wet dollar bills in my boxers where did you take me???
the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.
My ex-wife, who I haven't heard from since the divorce, just Amazoned me cherry flavored massage oil and a rainbow caps with the message "Happy Pride". What's the polite response?
Randomize
