normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
bring the vodka.
i thought we were going to mcdonalds..?
we are.
you know it's the perfect hook up when you don't have any friends in common with his girlfriend on facebook.
He called his prostate his "boner button".
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
Drink for every country you've never heard of.
Fuuuuuuuuuck
I'd rather take 10 virginities than catch something. Right now I should be good, I mean the sex with Jake was so bad he can't possibly have an std
I totally gave him head in sync to Beastie Boy's Sabotage playing in the background.
We're going to party like we don't have spanx on
Well I'll be shitfaced all day the 4th in honor of this great nation... but I'm down for drunken camping/nature fucking on the 5th
I had one beer! ONE BEER! They took shots in mourning of my tolerance last night. My ability to drink is a joke.
If he refers to me as slump buster one more fucking time.
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
Did you get your nipples pierced? I felt something poking through my shirt earlier and I really didn't want to say anything in front of your grandma...
I know. I know. He'll be weekday dick.
Randomize
