Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
Dude. The walls are totally staring at me right now. I told you this was a bad idea.
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.
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i found out she really is a mensa member
so she was the smartest passed out on the floor hair encrusted in vomit girl at the party
1) I'm a decent drunk texter. 2) My world is spinning. 3) I'll give you a dollar and a hug for a glass of water. 4) I love you. 5) Example: your penatrive ways are overwhelming my alternative lyfestyle. 6) That is all.
7) Noodle arms: engage
The example was me just using big words while hammered. You're welcome. Ambidextrious. I spelled it right.
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
Home-made laxative recipe: activia yogurt and tequila shots. Any ratio ought to work.
I didn't know what to do so I panicked and puked in my pillowcase with my pillow still inside.
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I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
You have no concept of how high I am, do you?
She's going to jail in a few weeks but she just got a boyfriend. Yet I'm still single as fuck.
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
I think I'm more excited for Santa to come now that I made a drinking game out of it
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