David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
How do you tell if you're on the terrorist watch list?
They only remember me when they're drunk...I'm like a suppressed memory.
You were demanding water from a bottle but I didn't have one..so I just took the water bottle from the hamster cage. You're welcome.
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
I might have been fine if i had magic teleportation powers and could have skipped the car ride between bar and home
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
So neither of us had a dollar bill and we couldnt find a straw so we spent all nite doing coke through penne pasta
I'm gonna write a song for the kids called "you're systematically killing your mother". In it I will explain that my recent hypertension and increase in smoking is due to them being dicks
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
Life should not be this hard with a dick this big.
You know your late night booty call was a huge fail when you go back to your car after it's over, and it's still warm.
Randomize
