3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
I'm drinking bacardi out of her mom's eco-green starbucks mug and chasing it with her sister's "for track only" vitamin water. Hello suburbia
I wore my underwear in the shower just in case i passed out and you had to come in and get me
And this is the part where I need you not to judge me. Remember that I have never seen a penis do that and that I have a weird sexual curiosity
Hey Im running from the cops. hiding in a bush. when you're approaching the intersection honk the horn twice and I will come out.
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
Found your glasses drenched in ketchup on my driveway this morning
Please, take the 2 shots of vodka that I left as an apologie.
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
This is my life. Enjoy the view
Meeting up with one of your students at your drug dealers house is always an awkward moment
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
I woke up next to a box of cheese bread it was super romantic
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
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