So I'm stoned for 420, and have an eye doctor appointment in fifteen minutes
Are your eyes okay
I mean if I was Asian they would be
Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
Let me just inform you of my purse contents right now. Three cum rags, a sock full of cum, xanax, and a fake moustache. This is my life.
Can you do me a favor and fuck someone with a car so I can get a ride home?
ur roommate just sent me a pic of us fucking. i'm not coming over anymore.
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
Apparently I've told this bouncer I stalk him on Instagram 3 times. I should stop drinking. I only remeber saying it tonight. early sign of Alzheimer's
Ahhh the shame of taking out my recycling
Randomize
