seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
And my fence, why is part of it on the roof?
I would say a second date is not looking likely, I acciedentally bit his penis. it's still bleeding 43 minutes later.
Pre-crushing the pills for tomorrow morning. This way I can sleep in an extra 10 minutes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He tried to bang a 300 pounder last night. No joke. I shotgunned a tall boy in a bar cuz the bartender didn't crack the beer. Cant wait till Nashville.
Ok John needs to move to the other side of the county. I do not like to be approached for a blow job in the produce section of Holiday Market.
HURRY. I NEED DRUNK. MORE DRUNK.
Idk I've been drinking all day and they're having me blow shit up. Like dont let the drunk chick play with fire and explosives. Common sense 101. I will fuck something up
Just chugged a Bloody Mary in 60 seconds flat. New personal best! Happy Sunday!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
Some girl just ordered Chinese delivery to her therapy appointment...
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
My new boobs got me 12 drinks at the concert. Whose the real winner here?
You also spilled beer on my dog and tried to wipe it off with a paper towel but he kept getting away from you.
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
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