Your roommate was biting my friend last night. It was weird.
He wants to call Lloyd's of London and have my mouth insured.
you have no idea how wierd it is to get nudes while talking to grandma
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL.
I say we go and bring jello shots with laxatives. 57% sure one of his toilets is broken
Got a handy at the foam party. Took girl home. Banged her. Thanked her for foam handy. "what handy?"
When Vanessa's kindergarten teacher called me in because she was caught with her hand down some boys pants in the bathroom, I knew you babysat last week.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also the girl beside me smells like she's been in a deep fryer.
So I woke up alone in the hotel room clutching a bible to my chest. Explain, please.
I can check masterbating in China off the bucket list.
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
If I told the doordash driver it's national nudity day, think he'd still report me for being topless at the door?
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