I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
Fuck that. Livers are so overdramatic and attention hungry.
i wanted to be an indian when i was a child. apparently you cannot grow up to be an indian.
please hurry. your mom just evil laughed to herself in the kitchen like she's plotting my death.
sorry for covering your dog in whipped cream. his bark made it sound like he wanted it.
Sunrise bitch. You owe me waffles
Listen I'm a sentimental character under all this alcohol and ratchetry
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
dying me prepared for dead me... i woke up with my laptop open to the last snl episode, a bottle of gatorade, advil and a bag of chocolate all next to me
I'n not even sure we went out, but I know we broke into a cemetery.
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
It’s a prereq for med school, so I hope the professor likes blow jobs
Randomize
