And then he said "I can't get blown while Gordon Bombay and Mr. Holland stare at me from the TV"
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
kerrys trying to convince everyone in the bar shes a lesbian. cheers to not being the drunkest girl in the room. i probably wont piss myself tonight.
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
you started putting condoms on anything with a point, then you were yelling at the lamp for using your last condom...
Am I texting you while being used as a stripper pole by two half-naked women? hint: I am.
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
Hell hath no fury like a woman whose gay sidekick you insult
There are so many things that would come back to haunt me if I ran for President someday.
like that video of you mad stoned vomiting in the bdubs parking lot after going to a pizza buffet screaming how you needed to make room for froyo
Wat
I've been here 11 months and i just realized i have literally never looked at my apartment/roomates sober
how come you came home with "Amanda owns this" written on your forhead
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
Its okay. I just know how you can text with your hands cuffed behind you back, so I had no idea what "oh shit" meant.
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
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