and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
just drove past a church sign that said "jesus got 'er done" ... welcome to the south
Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
He went so fast i didnt even have time to pretend like i was about to have a fake orgasim
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You broke out your mechano set and told us you were gonna "build us a beer machine" and 5 min later you were fast asleep
so I'm in athletic shorts, a suit jacket and I'm still drunk at 6:30am at the last leg of relay for life
Legit screaming match in this bar over the differences between cupcakes and muffins.
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
Just realized I could have five different dicks in me the day of valentines day but no real date. My life
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's the 3rd time in 6 months I woke up on the hallway floor using a towel as a blanket, no clue how I got there. At least back when I was still drinking I could blame something other than myself for that kind of shit.
You should go to AA meetings and warn people about the dangers of sobriety.
At the ER. John needs stiches. Fuck pub trivia nights.
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
Only in the emergency room do they shut the door when youre laughing too hard
I just found a condom in my jolly ranchers bag. This is a good omen.
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