My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
pretty sure that I broke my nose during sexting. Life is grand.
it would be nice to just get drunk, not hook up with anyone, and not die this weekend
Someone spilled vodka all over the elevator floor. Bring straws.
he told me to hold it and try to write my name in the snow and it seemed like a bonding moment because neither one of us had ever done that before. i didn't anticipate it vibrating and weirding me out therefore making me let go and get my hand peed on.
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
So we were having sex and his roommate walks in eating a bag of chips. Then proceeds to talk to us about his bitch of a professor.
Did he at least offer you guys chips?
I just sugar scrubbed my vagina. If I don't get laid tonight, me and the universe are gonna have some problems.
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
Randomize
