Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
So, apparently I made everyone omelets last night. Even when I'm drunk, I'm still a trophy wife.
Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
He said he wanted to see my room, not my womb. It's a common mistake.
It's what America was founded on: former hookups referring you for a job four years later.
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
dude i'm so hungover my hair hurts
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
I had a dream that I had to take a breathalyzer but then it turned out to be a bong....why can't that be real life?
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
Nothing says I'm committed to you for all eternity like letting him wear crocs to the wedding
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
are you watching the world series?
I've made out with alex bregman... so yes
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