Help i just walked in on mom blowing dad
my door was closed and her door was closed but even over the r.kelly playing at full blast i was able to hear her say "THAT'S NOT THE RIGHT HOLE!". Def rethinking my roommate situation.
yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
Ignoring the crisis im in. Sitting in the front yard in a kiddie pool. Wearing arm floaties, fins and a snorkel. Waiting for a hot guy to walk by.
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
Euphemism? No, "pantsless vodka yoga" is a legitimate pastime of mine
do you remember in the middle of fleeing from the cops you stopped in the middle of the road to make out with quail man?
Also, there's the possibility of falling 5 feet to your death to make it more exciting
In which case I will yell FIVE SECOND RULE and continue to slam you
Not yoga, whiskey. Totally mis-typed whiskey.
Last night you made me help you pick the raisins out of a kashi bar and acted like it was the most important thing to ever happen to you or our friendship
this could be the second dad I've smoked weed with
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
90% sure I just sold adderall to my professor
100% proud
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