any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
I really shouldn't have to apologize. It was your own damn fault for opening a tab at the bar and telling me about it.
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
I'm still in shock that he came by my house for five minutes dropped off a Teddy bear and went to the strip club on valentines day
You kept apologizing for not offering me some of your Whisky, which you referred to as "Jesus Nectar".
The empty keg landed on my head. It's a good thing we already got shitfaced or i'd be a vegetable and the humor would be completely lost.
Nothing quite like pre-gaming the Kentucky Derby with adderall and adderall. I'm fairly confident I could outrun all of these fucking horses in a foot race right now.
Gave him an awesome blow job on his living room couch last night, so at least he'll have something nice to think about next time he's watching the Tigers lose.
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
Vodka drinking games. Where you wake up next to a douche lord and see your thong in the blinds.
You have not lived until you have drunkenly grinded on your mother. Daughter of the year right here.
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
Probably should start having regular sex again too to lose this breakup weight. Good cardio.
I CAN'T FALL IN LOVE WITH SOMEONE WHO HAS A LISP. I JUST CAN'T.
Randomize
