I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
im so poor im using the bottom of my laptop to heat my food.
Only way we know if he truly fits in is if we spill straight vodka on the floor and his first instinctnis to lick it up. Otherwise, gameover.
She looked at my facebook and decided to bump the security deposit up an extra 250...now we have to destroy the house, its expected and I wouldn't want to disappoint
i don't know man, last time i saw her she was applying sunblock to her vagina
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
Honestly, it's his loss. He went for the free sample when he could've gotten the whole package, babes.
does that make me the free sample at the grocery store he didn't like enough to buy...? yeah, that advice didn't help, but thanks.
The girl in the stall next to me is puking her brains out, I'd say she had just a good a weekend as us
I gave her some alkaseltzer ad she looked at me lke I was god
I need a pedicure
You need to go to planned parenthood
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
He just told me I was beautiful, whilst I peed into a cup. If this isn't love I don't know what is.
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
I can't talk, I can't walk, I think I'm twitching and I'm not even sure if I'm typing this. Help
Randomize