Hungover Fun Fact #4: Eating a grilled stuffed burrito WILL make you blow chunks in the ice maker at work.
Don't play hard to get, I've seen some of the girls you've slept with.
He blow dried my hair while I sucked his dick. Now THAT'S fucking teamwork.
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
There are pictures of you on the shoulders of some old guy dressed as borat
Need your help. He's locked himself in the bathroom with his bong and his childhood collection of Goosebumps books.
Made out with a girl in a wheelchair and rode her around while I was blackout. On a new level.
I was dressed as bob Ross as this occurred
Just say its a British thing. They wont know Its not. And if they say you're not British, proposition them for a post-sex game of cricket.
The fact that when I blacked in you were sober enough to kick me out of your roommates bed makes me question our friendship.
I hear sloppy seconds go great with fried rice
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
My one night stand said I love you, opened my fridge, stole my cream cheese and left.
By far the fardest thing to do drunk is open a band aid
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
tell me about the eggs
Randomize
