i fucked some guy last night. i called him nick jonas by mistake. i'm 24.
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
It's just a condom. Most people would commend me for saying I was going to start using them, and you're acting like I'm going to try heroin.
Good. I hope they all got E.Coli from snorting coke off of some homeless prick's asshole.
I had to physically pry the rocks out of your hands so you wouldn't throw them at the guy with the cowboy hat. You probably would've missed anyways.
Captain Morgan didnt let me down when i stand up it feels like the world is trying to hand me rainbows.
My new dealer was watching Space Jam and eating ham off a frisbee when I went over. He's my new favorite person
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
the liver wants what the liver wants
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
Why are your pants in the freezer?
we've talked on the toilet we're linked now
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
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