Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
Tostitos scoops are the best shotglasses ever. Eat it after as a chaser.
you didnt remember my name all night. you kept referring to me as "the blonde with the fat ass"
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
Just asked my dog if he was proud of me for making it home. That drunk.
I want to have a prehistoric party. By that, I mean I want to dress up as a dinosaur and get drunk. That's all I want in life.
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In my dream, you became a famous tap-dancer. Congratulations.
Every time you visit for the weekend I end up having to bleach my entire house after.
I ended up in bed with a man from London in a sorority wing I am not apart of. Tequila fucks you up
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
Last night this creepy guy asked me my name and I told him it was Jaundice and he called me that all night
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
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