i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
this kid down the hall keeps banging on his drums...i feel like i'm living in jumanji
Do u think I can claim pregnancy as an accident so my insurance covers it?
i have a reoccuring irrational fear i'm going to walk in on my dad masterbating. Night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He threw up over the balcony and blamed it on an invisible garden gnome.
Wait, how do girls masturbate?
I dunno we use shower heads I guess.
..how does it fit?
Judging by my dry clothes and wet sheets, I think I might have gotten out of bed, pissed ON it, covered it up, and passed out on top of it
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
nothing like going to the bathroom, running into the wall, thinking its a person and saying"its ok i just had the 4 beers" even the wall knew i was lying
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She insisted on cleaning her room in the dark. 5 minutes in, she forgot what she was doing and started putting shirts on instead of hanging them up.
Her craziness is the sexiest thing about her.
I can't wait to read your obituary.
dont know how to tell my grandparents I woke up in a frat house in the wrong town and that's why I can't see them today
In other news, I woke up still drunk and I think I literally just broke the Guinness book of world records for most bloody Mary's in one day...
You gotta come over now. He is eating cupcakes while they are still in the foil.
you were trying to drink the laundry detergent and yelling blue drankkkkk
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