Pick my eyebrow is burning. I'm sitting in the back of dolows vat and listening to jolly music and wilfgang is signing and looking food. Cute kid. Home is where I go now.
what. the. fuck.
My poo smells like dog food. That's how I know it was a good night.
mid blow job she looked up and said "we aren't even facebook friends!"
I thought I walked in on an orgy of smurfs. Man I love shrooms
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
I can't. I think his penis is about to take out a restraining order against me.
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
I'm giving head in a stairwell, I'll be back in a few minutes. I'm so ashamed.
The zombie version of you bit my friend's hand. No more zombie crawl for you. Not ever.
Of two things I'm absolutely sure: 1. I only took 2 hits off that joint and 2. I definitely ran over hedwig on the way home
I just told my bowl "sorry" for putting it down, because I thought I hurt its feelings. omg. I'm high.
YOU ARE THE ONLY PERSON I KNOW THAT STEALTH CLEANS PEOPLE TOILETS
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
What the fuck dude?
Sorry bro...
YOU HUMPED ME FOR AN HOUR WHILE YELLING "I GOTTA ASSERT DOMINANCE"
Bad part of last night: I puked in my hair. Good part of last night: I assembled a posse.
You kept pulling me aside saying "look what I found"
Randomize
