mutual masturbation is only cool if cash money records is involved.
hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
If a fat man falls in the shower and nobody is in the apartment, does his pride still hurt? Answer: yes
HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
She kept saying my hands are a cupcake factory
He made me a "booty call of the year" award.
It's a sign that no dudes december is about to start: I have a yeast infection.
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
Just had a horrible realization. I've fucked a guy with a webbed foot AND a guy with a third nipple.
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
In other news my pubic hair is covered in glitter.
Basically one minute I'm sucking on her nipples and then 45 mins later we're at work and she's my boss.
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????