dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
vagina is talking i cant
My parents foreign exchange student just walked in on me whacking off. Welcome to America :)
he is allergic to cats. we can only glue dog hair on him. otherwise he might die and i dont want to be responsible for that.
ahaha ok
let's call it "werewolfing"
I keep telling girls I work at the carnival and then guessing their weights. I'm pretty sure I'm about to get kicked out.
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
I've carried my liver for over 24 years. If it can't carry me for the next 24 hours than it deserves to be damaged.
the manly guy you want to date so badly? he's at the club. as a drag queen. wearing higher heels than you own. think about that.
I tried to roll down the stairs in a ball. I have bruises, the pain is too much.
What the fuck, why would you ever do that?
Haven't you ever just wanted to be a ball?
ever had one of those days where you say fuck it and lick the inside of a bag of chips
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
I am at 99 matches in less than 24 hours, I need a tinder rehab program
I saw a picture of a baby and it reminded me to take my birth control. Priorities
So, I'm roughly 90% sure that the guy next to me in the xray waiting room is watching porn on his phone right now
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
Randomize
