I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy
So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
I saw an Asian dude carrying a patchwork denim purse get into a car with two rednecks at the grocery store tonight. Imagine what I could have seen if I had actually done something interesting.
he had to chose between the booze and condoms
what did he choose?
the booze, then looked at me and said, plan b is free right?
When health care reform is passed, I'm throwing a kegger
You are the reason we need health care reform
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
Do you want the really bad news or the bad news? Or do you want it in chronological order?
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
I don't know where I am and I feel like a hippo shat in my mouth. This sofa is comfy though.
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
I just made a drink so ill shit. It's goona be great. Ill tell you about it when you get here. Get pumped. For my shit.
I had sex with a boy who lives in a closet, that's like having sex with Harry Potter, right?
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
He tripped and fell all the way to the ground and then stood right back with out spilling a drop of his 3/4 full glass of rum and coke. It was like watching something from the matrix
Randomize
