I'm watching CSI, they found semen in the woman's ear.
Guess she heard her killer coming
Slutty costumes are my most sacred holiday tradition! Wearing a not-slutty costume is like putting cheezwiz on a communion wafer.
I just ate a can of beans for dinner so I can afford to go get a 5$ bottle of wine. I really did not think these choices would still be necessary at age 25.
What is a foreign vacation of stupidity without some fake names?
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
Man my junk looks like a mangled grapefruit right now, this shit sucks.
I SHITYOUNOT DAN JUST PUNCHED A DEER IN THE FACE. MID LEAP.
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
i refuse to give everyone the satisfaction of seeing the results of my acting on my thoughts
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
roommate singing save a horse ride a cowboy wearing a cowboy hat a bikini and jeans while humping the couch.
You’d probably be happy to know that I think I’ve mastered the skill of knowing “my type” and then steering clear
FINALLY. I THOUGHT THIS DAY WOULD NEVER COME!
Listen, she cheated on him first. I've known both of them since we were 12. They have no secrets from me. And yes, as a matter of fact, I absolutely did enjoy screaming out his name into his, soon to be, ex wife's pillow.
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