i passed out on the floor in my hallway and woke up with my dog licking himself 2 inches from my face. my first reaction? envy
I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
saw a pregnant woman in a bridal gown standing on the side of the road while her car was getting searched by police....cheers to new beginnings
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
Think of where it's been though. That Dr. Suess book, "Oh the Places You'll go" was written for his penis.
"it's Wednesday" isn't a good enough excuse to take my debit card and use it for your own drunken needs. You owe me 250 bro
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
I SHITYOUNOT DAN JUST PUNCHED A DEER IN THE FACE. MID LEAP.
I think I fell in love with her when I saw her kick a freshman in the chest
I would professionally fuck the shit out of her
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
Typical. We're ready to go, and you're not wearing pants.
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