There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
TAKE DOWN THAT PHOTO OF ME IN THE NURSES COSTUME NOW.
I am swimming in semen. He must have been holding it in for a special occasion.
afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
chipotle is closed for thanksgiving... I am officially thankful for NOTHING.
I was so drunk that I didn't realize he was staying at the Waldorf. I walk of shamed the Astoria, do you even know what this means?
I don't know if it's lucky or if it really just makes my tits look THAT good, but I've never NOT gotten laid with this bra on
Dude, I fucked her last night with nothing but my bandana on. Like straight Indian chief style.
If you come, call before you come in. I'm tanning my balls. Enjoy that visual.
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
According to this USDA thing I just read, I should either get upper respiratory issues or begin to bleed from my nose and mouth.
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
That tampon felt like a stick in my vagina, I am never making a drunken tampon choice again. Friends don't let friends choose tampons drunk.
Your sister just admitted to being a " much bigger bitch" than you. So you've got that going for you, which is nice.
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