Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
He started telling people I was Stephen Hawking's son. When that didnt fly he switched to Tony Romo's cousin
he said i was so drunk that i shared a urinal with him and we simultainiously peed
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
My roommate is either deadlifting a bus or having sex. I can't tell which
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
The guys in the quick check just recognized me as the girl who bought rolling papers and whipped cream. This is the walk of shame on crack.
Some toppless girl just walked past me in the hall and gave me half a carton of smokes. I have never been more aroused.
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
you know you're sexually deprived when you're holding a warm taquito in your hand and your vagina starts to tingle
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