can we please take bets on how much therapy you'll need in the future?
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
Setting up an obstacle course with ladders, hurdles, and a spring board to the pool. you down for drunk races through it later?
He stumbled into my room, flopped on my bed, shoes on my pillow and asked me for a juice box. Then fell asleep with the juice box on his forehead.
Fate is real! that hot chick, Megan just showed up dressed as jasmine and I'm dressed as Aladdin this is going to be cake
Jesus himself couldn't make a better sandwich
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
He licked my mouth. I felt like I was making out with my dog.
I'm a great relationship counselor. My vagina will let you know if your relationship is gonna work or not.
I sign my lease Thursday, I'm about to be released back into the wild.
I'll make missing person signs.
You're a good friend.
please tell me he didn't just scream 'i am the yiff lord' at the cops
You just kinda wondered into the street and started screaming at dogs and small children...
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize
