so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
i never thought i could drink so much vodka in 8 minutes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
Seriously I will never run in my wedges while drinking racing home to have sex ever again
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
If there's so much of a hint of a whisper from somebody I didn't tell personally, I will cut off your balls with a chainsaw, cauterize the wound with a flaming rusty spoon, feed your balls to your dog, and feed them to you when he shits them out, capiche?
Please come and kill me with a brick you dont even have to be nice about it just smash myfucking skull in this is the worst hangover ive had for at least a week
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Some girl came up to us crying that she lost her phone and you said "if it's meant to be, let it be"
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
she just kept pointing at the cows and calling them field penguins
You smell like a steam boat captain.
Whatever your on right now, I want.
So a bottle of lube exploded all over my softball bag and Nike shirt.
TSA doesn’t allow handcuffs in carryon bags. Super fun they confiscated them in front of my boss and coworker.
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