we lost you for like an hour and then found you at some dive bar trying to teach dance lessons
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
i robbed the continental breakfast last night
we put a pacifier in your mouth because you kept drunkenly singing country music.
She has a lazy eye!
My other option is a hardwood floor
She kept telling the ambulance to sit down and then started crying when we told her it couldn't hear her
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
Seriously, I am going to crawl in a hole, sew my vagina shut, and spit acid on any man that comes near me.
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
The strip club incident sums up our friendship pretty well
Sometimes at I wake up from a dead sleep at 1am and call the bar just to hear the clink of the glasses and the pouring of the beer on tap in the backround
HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED
So I figured out why that guy from Tinder stopped messaging me back. He got married.
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
Randomize
