They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
I wish I was a power ranger. Also the universe is immense. Like it never ends. Never.
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
Im sorry i offered the man at mcdonalds your hand in marriage in exchange for some french fries
This is a whole new generation of premature ejaculators
I may or may not vaguely recall punching you in the dick but it was a misunderstanding and I forgive you can we have make up sex?
I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem
Then years and years after that I will send you a picture of my warped vagina from all the kids that I had.
He sent me nudes and I told him he reminded me of Buffalo Bill.
Everything is covered in gelatin and pam cooking spray. Jesus be a shield.
Don't be weirded out, but my bondage straps are made of my ex boyfriend's curtains
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
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