i hope chris hansen doesn't have a boat
You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
It was like little house on the drunk prairie.
Accidentally just signed something at work 'lotus flower' I need to keep my stripper life separate from real life.
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
I ate all his french fries. He was no longer useful to me.
Do you know how hard it is to be while you're high with a chuck Norris poster in the bathroom?
Wikipedia just saved you three hours and $30 on a bar tab. You should donate.
$5. Donated.
I went to her house she had a kid pool in her living room watching the vacation channel drinking rum out of the bottle saying" life is what you make it. Mines a vacation!!!"
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
I didn't want to leave, I wanted to move into his ass
There are only a few things more freaky than wandering around a zoo drunk.
You got up in the middle of a sentence, puked, came out and poured another glass of wine and continued your story.
I’m literally naked drinking a beer and I gotta leave in 6 minutes for work lol
Randomize
