worst. lesbian. ever. i'm not sure she knows a clit from a pencil eraser.
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
I have her designated blowjob hair tie on my wrist. It's like a key to eternal happiness
Nobody is here, I still yelled for someone to make me some toast. That my dear is commitment to doing nothing.
I need you to do me a favor and hide my sword from me tonight. I'm planning on drinking my weight in vodka and I don't trust myself enough to not run through campus screaming "I AM SPARTA!" You'll be saving me a mugshot as well as saving some innocent girls from tears.
Please save me from this creative non fiction class. I just wrote a paper about how I spend unhealthy amounts of time with my cat.
I spend unhealthy amounts of time watching RuPaul's Drag Race.
I referred to the cat as amicable.
Just talked to Laura, confirming that is my bra. Hope it goes well with the rest of your wall decorations.
I don't know if you've ever seen a group of 20 year olds reenact a rectal prolapse, but 'majestic' isn't really the word I'd use...
If you ever feel goofy just think of the fact that I just shaved the batman symbol into my pubes
Everclear isn't food dammit
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
I thought accidentally shaving off my fingertip while trying to shave my butthole was going to be the most unexpected part of my day, but no
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
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