people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
Riddle me this. What had unbelievable sex, and finally understands the meaning that things come better in pairs?
I hate you
You screamed 'pound me, you big thick stud.' I looked around for porn cameras.
Shut up. I did not.
I really wish I was making that up.
I had to stop messing around with him for fear of laughing in his face. I swear it was a pinky finger in his pants
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
yeah, i found the sharpie that everyone use to sign my tits last night. its dead.
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
I succsesfully kept my nipples in my dress all night. Even when I got in a fight. I was made for the bar.
That's the saddest description of touching yourself I've heard since someone said "I was just lazily rubbing my clitoris while eating Cheetos alone"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She just came home holding a fire hydrant. Yes a fire hydrant.
She broke up with me after I spent the whole day speaking in nothing but Marshawn Lynch quotes.
I'm sorry for breaking our door. And being a bitch about it.
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
And then she grabbed my dick and started singing 'ring ring ring ring banana phone'
We saw the mini basketball hoop and unicycle and just knew we had to create a new sport
Drunk minds think alike
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