Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
u know ur in oregon when the cop tells u to keep the beer cans he made u pour out so u can recycle them
loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
I want to fuck you on the side of the bed tonight.
babe, don't say it like that!
I'm sorry, I want to penetrate you on the edge of our sleeping quarters this evening.
23 Roommates Share Secrets Their Roomie Thinks They Don’t Know
I just put a tampon in while driving. Don't tell me I don't got skills.
Any questions about why there was a scuba tank chilling in the hot tub this morning?
i'm gonna need a rally to restore sobriety after this weekend...
Im only pretending to be his friend so I can sleep with his girlfriend.
I'm having a staring contest with a raccoon.
Where the hell are you
29 Cringeworthy Situations People Realized They Shouldn’t Be In
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
They tried to convince me I broke Alex's nose. Also they stranded me on the roof.
That's what they get for locking a drunk laxer in Mitch's car.
Made out with a chick in front of a girl I'm banging and successfully reDENNISed her within 9 hours
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
My 1st STD. I feel like there should be a cake for this.
He actually said the words 'I miss you' followed by 'I wanna have sex with your face'. I'd say that's a win.