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He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
just heard 2 nerds making fun of a girl for mispronouncing stochiometry. they followed it up by discussing the mathematical equation for getting laid. my day just became 100x better.
Did i throw a brick at someone last night?
She punched my vomit. In midair. Back into my mouth.
My chemistry professor just asked me if I ever found a ride home from the bar last Saturday
I got a handjob to the OC theme song. It was like going back in time 7 years.
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
Hey.. Here's a thought for the evening. There's only two more sleeps until I fuck you so hard my back teeth will convulse.. Here's too Tuesday! Woohooooo
I just bought $54 in Easter crap to try and blend in the pregnancy test... And FYI, it totally worked.
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
I got dressed on his front steps, peed on his neighbors lawn, then did a shoeless walk of shame home at 5am...
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