Pretty sure somebody just said 'I used to have a nipple'
that's awkward
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
He woke up in the ambulance thinking he was still in the club.
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
She said I looked exactly like my dad. Then she made out with me. Should I be questionable?
Oh you have a half-brother? Why that's right up my alley! Let's cause family strife
Tearing families apart since 2011.
Everyone heard you scream that I was to be naked, in your bed in 5 minutes. We were one hell of a shitshow spectacle
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
The cop looked me right in the eye and apologized for cock blocking me.
You were trust falling into bushes
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
I'm not a morning person, and, trust me, no matter how good your cock may be, it will not turn me into one.
Fuck this virus. We’re finally back on campus but the bars suck parties are banned sports are canceled we eat in our rooms and can’t fucking hangout with anyone. I’m tired of virtual classes and involuntary celibacy
OMG IKR! It’s not college unless we’re puking in a toilet wondering if we’re pregnant or just hungover!
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