oh god the rape fog is back!
Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
i need a shirt that says "I fuck trainwrecks"
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
If you don't remember anything tomorrow, this is to remind you that you asked me in secret to build a bobsled with you and re-enact Cool Runnings.
Hey we met at the bar a week ago. Your friend gave me a rose and you asked about my nipples.
Walmart at night is scary enough without having to run into people you've slept with
Mehhh. I just tried to type 'extremely', and it auto corrected to 'creek rot'. IT KNOWS WHAT I LOOK LIKE
FOUND: my underwear in the cabinet above the toilet. What the actual fuck.
I had sex on the roof of the dorm last night ... I feel like a combination of spiderman and van wilder
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
I found it. now I'm going to the gym to be "healthy" or whatever that folklore is called.
Rule number 1 of dorm living: do not forget your butt plug in the bathroom.
Well, fuck this election. I'm getting drunk, regardless of who wins.
Randomize
