Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
Going to get yelled at but I labeled the reel "four dried up sluts decide going to the middle east to shop during a war is the best idea ever"
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
You tried taking his shirt off at the bar. He was 37 and married with kids.
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
Well sorry I accidentally spooned your mom and possibly threw up on you
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
Oh no, we smoked the revival weed. It came in a Batman bag. It hit like justice. And orphans.
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
I forgot I did whipits. Probably because my brain cells were killed from the whipits
The bartender has no bra and is giving out free shots. Call mom I'm getting married.
we're so committed to being not committed
Sometimes I wish I could tell all my past/present hookups what the nicknames that my friends and I have assigned them.
Right. Cuz nothing screams "You made it!" quite like selling your used underwear to strangers you met on the internet.
Randomize
