You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
He asked me to sit on his face, but i didnt, for 2 reasons, one, i had just pooped like 20 mins before sex, and two, this could be my future husband. so i skipped on sitting.
I feel like you just avenged me for every guy who came in my hair
I'd like to come home and be able to sleep in a bed that's not filled with crumbs from you getting too high and passing out while eating. This is seriously getting ridiculous.
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
Nothing quite like pre-gaming the Kentucky Derby with adderall and adderall. I'm fairly confident I could outrun all of these fucking horses in a foot race right now.
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
We had a pillow fight. It looks like an angel exploded here. A DRUNK ALCOHOLIC ANGEL
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
Are you in a good mood because I stuffed you with enchiladas, ice cream, penis, and cuddles last night?
She's trying to change her flight... IM BEING COCKBLOCKED BY DELTA CUSTOMER SERVICE
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
I mean, if you want to light yourself on fire for maximum accuracy, far be it from me to stop you
Legit just looked at the gin bottle and said, “Aw fuck, I’m going to feel this in the morning.”
Randomize
