I realized today that the only reason you made out with Travis is because he has nice teeth
and if it starts getting weird im just going to tell him i used to be a man
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
I got spanked with a cardboard tube. Apparently he used to be a percussionist. Who favored marching band tunes. It was weird.
Second wave of rafting ended in a concussion. Don't worry though, the paramedic says it's still not considered a DUI.
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
the police told me I had to sign a waiver stating that my car will no longer be used for crime activity.
Why does my jaw hurt?
I may have punched you.
I spy something regrettable...
Oh my god. Stop!! It was one time and I still can't believe it.
I just know what's gonna happen. I mean. I shaved my legs up to shorts length. But I'm leaving the rest as a sort of makeshift caution tape.
My liver needs me to go back to work asap.
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
all i'm saying is don't blame me if your purses are filled with whoppers
are we talking malt balls or BK?
Randomize
