What are we going to do tonight?
What we try to do every night. Take over the world
Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
Also thongs make me have to fart a lot.
i just yelled "run, its godzirra!" to an asian kid who looked confused by the tornado alarm test
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
what started as sign language exam pre-drinks to calm the nerves turned into me waving at a deaf woman for 20 minutes
Make sure to show her the sewer we were arrested in on your tour.
We were trying to sober you with hotdog buns but you refused put half of it in your bra and said you'd save it for later
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
i get the sense she is planing new and exciting ways to physically harm me during sex
Hooked up with an ex Playgirl model. I feel like the universe just high-fived me for staying sober.
I JUST LIKE FLANNEL, NOT VAGINAS! OK?
You did things that should be illegal to a Twinkie and asked strangers to drive you home.
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
I do very much feel like vomiting. and I have no idea where that lighter came from. thank you for coming to my TED Talk.
Randomize
