Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
yeah she was being a bitch. do you remember me stealing ryan cabrerra's beer?!?!
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
No. I want to vom filet mignon and ziti bits everywhere and my body feels like I ran a cock triathalon. I feel less triumphant and more like death.
he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
He came over in a blaze orange vest with a case of beer and a shotgun yelling about "Dove Season" then passed out in the lawn. There he lies
At the ER. John needs stiches. Fuck pub trivia nights.
Next guy I fuck must be a cowboy
I got laid two nights in a row
And none for Gretchen Wieners...
Damn Instagram explore page. I am six months in to some girl I don't even know.
He told me that losing me was the biggest mistake of his life. Of course it was. My tits are incredible and I know more about college football than he does.
Oh, do you remember telling everyone you were with that your vagina was angry last night?
Randomize
